Tag: Relationships

Golden

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By Jae Vitug | World of Thoughts ©

Diamonds are often conceived as the strongest, the most beautiful, and the best find.

Drop a diamond on a sea of gold, wouldn’t it be the easiest to find rather than looking for the rarest piece of gold?

Drop a gold on a sea of diamonds, wouldn’t you still have chosen a diamond?

Isn’t the Holy Grail worth more than any diamond there is?

This resembles people’s misconception on choosing the best partner. They would consistently want whom humanity defines as perfect, and perfect, being, the diamonds.

Spare me.

Though it sounds vague, but I’d choose that one extraordinary gold.

I’d choose you.

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Say You Won’t Let Go

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By Jae Vitug | World of Thoughts ©

800x400-the-one-that-got-away-dating

“I told you to be patient, because in a moment I’ll be with you, and it will be a different kind…”

– Bon Iver (Skinny Love)

We’ve promised forever, but I guess promises really are meant to be broken, and forever, is just a matter of time.

Never have I expected that you’d leave me again, but hey, you did it once, why was I so stupid to believe that you wouldn’t do it again?

All you had to do was stay, all you had to do was give me that assurance that you’d be there.

I need to know you’d be there.

Isn’t that how “friends” are supposed to be? That’s how it’s supposed to work isn’t it?

However, we’re not only just the best of friends and you know that. When everybody’s gone, we are the constant ones. We’re each others’ anchors, we’ve been together through thick and thin, we have that strong bond that lasted through time, and that irrevocable connection that is ever present.

We’ve had so much history, but as much as I want to preserve what we have, I can’t only decide for us, I need you to want this too.

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Why No One Wins When Love Is A Game

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By Nikki Vee |  Elite Daily ©

Don’t text back for at least three hours. You can’t act too eager. Don’t call him when he’s with his friends.

Don’t act like you are too interested because boys don’t like that. You can’t make the first move or initiate anything, that’s desperate.

There are so many can’ts, don’ts and rules you need to remember if you plan on dating in this day and age.

Millennial dating isn’t about connecting or spending time with someone who makes you happy anymore.

It’s like the hunger games weren’t realistic enough, so we invented the love games.

The problem with these “love games” is that anyone who plays will ultimately lose. We’re so busy acting aloof and unattainable that we ruin anything potentially great before it even has a chance to get off the ground.

What is the point? Are we so obsessed with power and proving ourselves that we are willing to hurt everyone around us in the process?

A girl actually told me one time that because the guy she was seeing texted her last and she didn’t respond, she had “won.”

What does that even mean?

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Choose Her Every Day (Or Leave Her)

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By Bryan Reeves | The Good Men Project ©

Intimate relationships don’t last because you love each other. They last because you make—and remake—a choice.

I spent 5 years hurting a good woman by staying with her but never fully choosing her.

I did want to be with this one. I really wanted to choose her. She was an exquisite woman, brilliant and funny and sexy and sensual. She could make my whole body laugh with her quick, dark wit and short-circuit my brain with her exotic beauty. Waking up every morning with her snuggled in my arms was my happy place. I loved her wildly.

Unfortunately, as happens with many young couples, our ignorance of how to do love well quickly created stressful challenges in our relationship. Before long, once my early morning blissful reverie gave way to the strained, immature ways of our everyday life together, I would often wonder if there was another woman out there who was easier to love, and who could love me better.

As the months passed and that thought reverberated more and more through my head, I chose her less and less. Everyday, for five years, I chose her a little less.

I stayed with her. I just stopped choosing her. We both suffered.

Choosing her would have meant focusing everyday on the gifts she was bringing into my life that I could be grateful for: her laughter, beauty, sensuality, playfulness, companionship, and so… much… more.

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Read This If You Feel Like It’s Taking You Too Long To Move On

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By Heidi Preibe | Thought Catalog ©

Everybody seems to have a different rule about how long it should take you to get over something. If it’s a relationship, they tell you half the length of it. If it’s a loss they tell you approximately a year – long enough to go through each special occasion when you’re used to having them by your side.

We use language like ‘moving on’ and ‘letting go’ as though they’re actions as simple as shutting a door and physically walking away. We uncurl our fingers and drop whatever we are holding – that’s letting go, right? That’s all it takes?

I don’t think I’ve experienced a single loss in my life that I’ve gotten over in the time frame that seems to have been allotted by society as ‘acceptable.’ And I suspect that I’m not alone there. It is not human nature to let go. We are, at our core, territorial creatures. We fight to hold onto what we love. Giving up isn’t in any way instinctual.

If there’s anything I wish we could talk more about it’s the in-between stages of letting someone go. Because nobody lets go in an instant. You let go once. And then you let go again. And then again and again and again.

You let someone go at the grocery store when their favorite type of soup is on sale and you don’t buy it. You let them go again when you’re cleaning your bathroom and have to throw out the bottle of the body wash that smells like them. You let them go that night at the bar when you go home with somebody else or you let them go every year on the anniversary of the day you lost them.

Sometimes you’re going to have to let one person go a thousand different times, a thousand different ways, and there’s nothing pathetic or abnormal about that. You are human. And it isn’t always as simple as making one decision and never looking back.

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