No Strings Attached

By Jae Vitug World of Thoughts ©

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“You’ve always been this cheerful, happy, independent person that comes off to society as someone who doesn’t need anyone. But sometimes, those people whose always there for everyone are the ones in need the most of company.”


Lonely, but would rather go out there and escape things. Incomplete, but choosing to be held by a different set of arms with each time you go on a casual hook up. Miserable, but would somewhat just smile it all off.

You would rather be alone than enter the world of the unknown, being, relationships. You say you don’t want anything to do with it, but really, you’re in a constant hunt for it, but just won’t acknowledge it.

And being it as the inevitable, from the moment you’d find a shoulder to lean on, you’d jump at it quite instantly. You go on, until without noticing you’ll want more from him. You’ll want more than his friendship even though you promised you don’t want him. You’ll want him to be yours and that will blind you from reality.

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Same Old Love

By Jae Vitug World of Thoughts ©

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It has been a very long time…

It has been a year of firsts and lasts…

For the past months, I was brave enough to spill and wholeheartedly share my thoughts to the world. Believe me when I say that every blog post took incredible guts to write. Because on the night I started putting my hands to work on my thoughts, that’s when I proved that emotional writing totally breaks you apart on the inside.

But then, it helped me breathe freely, moving on without hard feelings, regrets, and grievances.

I know that I should embrace the thought of getting rid of you but I will never be okay deep down, not until I tell you every single detail that I’ve been wanting to say.

In this way, I could release all the built-up emotions I never expressed to you—all the things I assumed you knew.

I just want you to know that I’m writing this letter to you because I forgive you…

I don’t know how to begin. I don’t know the exact words that I should use to match with my neverending feelings, but here I am again… There are tears streaming down my face, yet I couldn’t feel the trickle…

I’m upset, but more than anything, I’m mad that after so many months, you still have that power over me. I’m angry that you still have this huge impact in me enough to make me cry. I’m disappointed with myself because up until now, you’re the one that I’m thinking about.

And that’s when it hit me—I’m not crying because I’m upset that we aren’t together anymore, I’m upset because I feel sorry for who you and I have become.

You came into my life at just the right moment, and for a while, made me the happiest and saddest I’ve ever been. You were the first of my many firsts: the first person to let me know what it feels like to fall in love, how gratifying it could be to have a constant companion, and what a disastrous breakdown of a relationship actually looks like.

You were the person I was looking up to, the person who I thought would never have the courage to break me into pieces, and the person I was proud to be with.

More than just that, I knew pain comes naturally l, but I kept loving you because I thought I could change the inevitable. I loved anyway, because it’s better to have loved and lost than to not have loved at all.

I’d like to say that I’m glad that you are well, but as we both know I have absolutely no idea how you are. You had your own reasons; I had mine. You were the best thing that has ever happened to me.

Thank you so much for days filled with happiness, laughter, and pain.

But I don’t know which was more excruciating – living with that horrible absence or being with you again. You were worth the risk that’s why I took the fall. Saying that I regret a single thing would mean that I regret what once made me happy.

I forgive you for not telling me your reasons ahead of time. I forgive you for the countless times you’ve had me shed tears. I forgive you for taking away the happiness inside me. I forgive you for making me feel that I’m not enough. I forgive you for breaking me into a thousand pieces.

And, I’m sorry… I’m sorry for the same reasons I’ve brought to your life.

I love you, and I would have given everything up to be with you but… I’d have to learn how to stop thinking about you again and let you go…

You’ll always be my sweetest downfall and my hardest goodbye. Maybe one day, you’ll think of me. Maybe one day, we’d even happen again…

But for now this is enough.

We’re both content.

You’re happy and that’s enough…


You’re Still The One | A Letter to Her

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The Moment of Truth

By Jae Vitug World of Thoughts ©

Lonely single female at the bar drinking

Is there really such thing as perfect timing? Is there someone really destined for you?

No. I don’t think so. I believe that there are only decisions, choices that are meant to be made. There’s not the right time that you have to make them, because if you really want something, you will make it happen.

And so you’ve made your decision, and my decision is counterfeited since I don’t think I can do more about it, rather than just hope you’d have a great future, the one without me as I imagined it to be…

Perhaps I was too optimistic, thinking that there could be more of us than just friends.

But friends don’t do what we do…

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You Have To Let Go…

By Anonymous |  Elite Daily ©

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I have seen several articles about getting toxic people out of your life, saying goodbye and letting go. When you progress through your twenties, you start to realize who is down for you and who is going to bring you down.

The thing is, even with all of those articles, most people do not ever say what happens after you get rid of the toxic person.

Well, I found out.

Over the past several years, I started to recognize that so many girls have at least one guy in their lives who caused them emotional heartache. One guy with whom they were confused about where they stood.

This one guy who made them question their self worth and who, unknowingly and probably not purposefully, ruined all of their other relationships…

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About Time

By Jae Vitug | World of Thoughts ©

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“Whatever happens tomorrow, we’ve had today. And if we should bump into each other sometime in the future, well that’s fine too, we’ll be friends.”

– Emma Morely (One Day, 2011)


July 21, 2015

Breathe…

You’re going to be okay.

Breathe and remember that you’ve been on this place before. You’ve been this uncomfortable, and anxious, and scared, and you’ve survived it.

Breathe, and you know you can survive this one too. These feelings can’t break you. They’re painful and debilitating, but you can sit with them and eventually, they will pass.

Maybe not immediately, but sometime soon they are going to fade, and when they do, you’ll look back at this moment and laugh for having doubted your resilience. I know it feels unbearable right now, but keep breathing, keep living, again and again.

This will pass.

I promise, it will pass…


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